True Change Through Jesus

 

Trent, 2nd Congregation

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Trent

Hello everyone, my name is Trent. My wife, Caleigh, and I have been in Singapore for two years, and we attend the Tanjong Katong Community Group. RHC has been a blessing to us in so many ways and I’m honoured to be able to share my testimony with you today. To be honest, I had deep feelings of inadequacy about doing this, and I am here only from the strength I have received through Jesus.

You may have heard testimonies peak at what many call a “lightning bolt” moment. A moment when God reveals himself to someone and they are struck with conviction to change their life. This is a very real, and powerful thing and we have heard testimonies like this before. But, I never had that lightning bolt moment. My story is not one of sudden transformation, but of a slow faith journey.

I was born into a Christian family, as some of you may have been, and I had amazing parents that taught me what it meant to be a follower of Jesus. I remember giving my life to Jesus at a young age, repenting of my sin and seeking his forgiveness. My father baptised me at our church when I was about 12 years old. When I was 14 years old, I started drinking alcohol. And this marked the beginning of an unhealthy pattern of sin: substance abuse, lying, cheating, stealing, and the list goes on. But, I still checked a lot of the boxes. I went to church on Sundays. I had good grades, sports, and lots of friends. My parents, not knowing the extent of my sins, were proud of me. I was in control of my life. Nothing could go wrong on my watch. And yet, fast forward to age 20. I hit rock bottom – waking up on the concrete floor of a jail cell. My second time being arrested in two years. And I’ll never forget the look on my parents’ face when they bailed me out of jail. There wasn’t much to be proud of anymore. I went home that day, crawled into bed, and cried like a baby. I could feel that my life had slipped away from me. I was no longer in control. Sin controlled my life and I was alone. But in that darkness, Jesus appeared. I felt him physically reach down from heaven and place his hand on my shoulder. A sign that I was forgiven and not alone.

Remember that lightning bolt moment I mentioned? This should have been that moment. My life should have changed. But, I’m ashamed to say, it didn’t. Slowly but surely, I slipped back to my old ways. I “regained control”. Then, in my last year of university, I took a trip to Asia for a month, and it was filled with unhealthy behaviour. Nothing too harmful happened, I thought. Caleigh and I were dating then, so when I got back and came clean about the details of my trip, she cried.  

I finally started to realise the extent of what my sin was doing. Now, this was not a lightning bolt moment, BUT it was the start of a change in my life. It was one step. One of many small steps that have taken a long time. Let me be clear, this has not been controlled by me. I tried that, and it clearly didn’t work. This change was only possible through the strength I had in Jesus Christ. Slowly since that day I have moved closer and closer to God, who I now realise was pursuing me the whole time. There was no more Jesus touching my shoulder, but there was prayer, God’s word, embracing my church community, and a lot of seeking forgiveness. The Holy Spirit was working in me every step of the way, giving me the strength. It still is.

This may sound silly, but I have this scar on my ring finger. A scar from one of my reckless days. I frequently look at it, and despite the bad memories it may accompany, it brings me joy because my wedding ring now covers it. My wife, Caleigh, to me is the most amazing person in this world. Despite my sin, despite my past, she loves me anyways. She has forgiven me. Folks, this is pale in comparison to the love and forgiveness we receive through Jesus Christ and his death on the cross.

Colossians 1:13-14 says:

He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

You may be like me. Maybe you never had a lightning bolt moment, maybe you just struggle with sin. Maybe, like me, you feel like a bit of a phony sometimes. Like you aren’t worthy enough to do this Christianity thing. A few months back, Jesus spoke to me through a verse from the song “my worth is not in what I own”.

 It says:

Two wonders here that I confess
My worth and my unworthiness
My value fixed, my ransom paid
At the cross

None of us are worthy. Yet, we are worthy at the same time. God has given us his grace, love, and forgiveness through Jesus’ death. Don’t be mistaken, He is seeking you out today. Don’t wait for a lightning bolt moment, just take a step towards him in response, and then another, and another, and He will bring you peace. He will meet you, at the cross.

Thank you.