How God's Love Helped Me Detach My Identity from the World
Cheryl, 2nd Congregation
Cheryl
My life had been very smooth sailing growing up and because of that, I always thought I knew the way to life. I had quite an idealistic view of the world, but that bubble burst during a very difficult time of my life starting 2018. At that time, I was in a 4-year long relationship that seemed to be perfect in the eyes of others. I took pride in that, especially when this big aspect of my life seemed to be going well.
Things took a very drastic turn in 2018 when I experienced betrayal in this relationship. I felt disappointed and helpless as my self-worth crashed overnight. Unwilling to accept the loss of this relationship, which was a core building block of my identity, I started to find many reasons to justify why this happened. I felt that the betrayal was because I was not loving or understanding enough in the last 4 years. With this mindset, I continuously pursued reconciliation which led to repeated instances of betrayal and finally gave up after an exhausting 2-years of trying to make things work. Through this season, I realised that even the closest people will fail you.
To move on from this, I attempted to attach my identity to something more “promising” and within my control. I focused a lot on driving personal growth through self-help books, career achievements, and new workout routines. All these helped me to feel better temporarily but after a year, I started to feel empty and tired of relying on my own strengths.
So after being tired of attaching my identity to achievements, I came across a new concept of detachment which promised a happier life if I were able to detach my identity from things of this world and just focus on my own happiness. However, I found this impossible to do and was also struggling to understand the purpose of this. I recall asking myself, “Am I that great? For me to not care about everything else other than the fulfillment of my own needs?”. Once again, this was not the answer I was searching for, and this made me feel even more frustrated and lost.
One day, as I was confiding in a new friend about my struggles, he shared that we all have a natural inclination to attach ourselves to things, as we are all built with a desire for connection. He mentioned finding comfort in God’s love as a way to detach his identity from things of this world. That’s when God revealed to me that His love was the answer to my struggles.
As I went on to explore the faith and eventually put my faith in Jesus, I learnt that because of God’s love, He gave His one and only Son to die on the cross for us so that we can be reconciled to Him and be identified as His children. Knowing this is so freeing because I no longer need to rely on my own strengths to build my own identity. Through faith, my identity is now anchored in Christ, in His death and also His resurrection.
There are many days where I still struggle with insecurity or even external circumstances that seem so out of control, but knowing that Jesus really rose from the dead gives me the assurance to live my life with security and confidence in Christ, as He has already overcome death and given us victory through Him.