Great Is Thy Faithfulness
27 May 2020
Abby is a member of the 2nd Congregation. She shares with us how planning for a wedding during COVID-19 has further refined her view of marriage and of God.
Our wedding was scheduled for mid-May. John and I had planned a big ceremony, followed by lunch, a tea ceremony, and a dinner banquet complete with dancing. However, with each new announcement of COVID-19 restrictions, our plans were forced to change. First, our friends and family from overseas who were planning to travel to attend our wedding had to cancel. Subsequently, the size of gatherings was limited to 250, forcing us to curb our guest list and cancel the banquet. Then, the limitation dropped to 10 people.
When we were asked to share a letter we sent canceling our wedding ceremony, we initially felt embarrassed. Our current difficulties and discouragements are minor compared to what many others are going through. We are in good health. Our families are healthy. We are financially stable and, by God’s grace, we are currently in the same country. We praise God for these mercies.
At the same time, our disappointments are real. We believe God cares about each of us personally and understands the difficulties we are going through during this time.
In my disappointment, I have found comfort in Psalm 23. The same God we can call Abba Father is a strong and kind shepherd. I look back on my life and time and again I've found goodness and mercy weaved into his kind leading in every way and in every season. He was there for both the good and the dark times, so why wouldn't he be with us now in this circumstance too? I think it would be a mistake to view pain or disappointment as a sign that God has forsaken us or forgotten us. I look to the cross and know with more certainty now that he has not. During hard days, I pray the words of the father whose son was possessed with an unclean spirit. He went to Jesus and said, "I believe, help my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24). Even when I fail to be faithful, the Lord does not return my unfaithfulness with what I truly deserve. He responds with faithfulness. I have learned that laying down all the emotions I feel at the feet of God, our shepherd, is the safest thing to do.
In my weakness, I would not be able to press into God’s goodness alone. So he demonstrates his faithfulness by sending me friends and sisters who have spoken life to my heart. Some just call and we cry together, others consistently send text messages that point me back to the gospel, and some send soul food that speaks to my heart. God saved us into community precisely for this reason: fellow saints walking the same narrow road pouring love into one another as a reminder of God's goodness. As they pour into me, I feel God's comfort which then encourages me to "comfort those in any trouble with the comfort [I have] received from God." (2 Corinthians 1:3).
We might not understand why God has chosen to allow COVID-19 to come into the world but his plans are always precise and he is never taken by surprise. Our hope can be found in Jesus who sees and knows our deepest heartaches even those beyond not having the wedding we want. But even more than that, God is using this experience to change and renew us so our suffering is not wasted. Submitting all unmet expectations to the will of the Lord and pressing in on the path of obedience to Jesus alone will produce a peculiar glory in time to come. Even the smallest of all sufferings is not wasted because Jesus lives. It is working for us an eternal weight of glory and this glory is infinitely better than our earthly wedding.
We sent our guests the following letter before the “circuit breaker” restrictions were announced. We are sharing it with the RHC community as an encouragement and reminder that God’s providence is gracious, right, and for our good. We praise God during this time and thank him for refining us as we are reminded to focus on what is most important, especially during the difficult times.
Dear Family & Friends,
We are writing to let you know that we will still get married but at a small private ceremony with our family. Our hope is that once the current crisis has ended and social gatherings have returned to normal, we can gather together with you later for a full and joyful celebration of our marriage.
We are glad that the measure of a wedding is not reliant on how pretty the bride’s dress is, how good the wedding food is, or how grand the celebrations are. We wanted our wedding to display the glory of marriage as a reflection of the love that Jesus has for the church. In marriage, the act of treasuring and beholding Jesus is made up of little moments all throughout life, and not the culmination of one moment. We wanted Christ to be central in our wedding preparations and at the wedding itself, but the demonstrations of the love of Jesus are bigger than our wedding day. We have been reminded in recent days that God’s ways are mysterious and beyond our understanding, and that he is in control, not us. We willingly submit to the sovereignty and power of a God who has purposed our marriage for a time like this, even if it means we must forgo the celebration we had planned. We acknowledge and accept that his plans work for our good, and that he alone knows what we truly need.
In this time, we repeat the words of Psalms 34, “I will praise the Lord no matter what happens... Let all who are discouraged take heart. Let us praise the Lord together and exalt his name.” We find great kindness in the way God is leading us, for he is a good and gracious shepherd. We are grateful for the gifts he has given us, this marriage included, for he is a loving father. Even in sorrow, we are always rejoicing for his providence is sweet and bitter.
We invite you to rejoice with us and pray for us. We love you and earnestly desire to share the joy of our union with you in person very soon.
To end, we share a verse from the song, Great is Thy Faithfulness by The Austin Stone, which was the song Abby was meant to walk down the aisle to. We find comfort that in singleness and marriage, Jesus is our treasure, our pleasure, and our greatest delight. In all of life, he is faithful for he never changes.
“I could not love Thee, so blind and unfeeling;
Covenant promises fell not to me.
Then without warning, desire, or deserving,
I found my Treasure, my pleasure, in Thee.
Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father
There is no shadow of turning with Thee”
Love,
John & Abby